THE ARTISTS SECRET METHOD FOR BECOMING FILTHY RICH
Are you feeling rejected by the art world? Devalued? Dejected?
Underappreciated? Can’t shake off that tired sense of vagueness?
Feel like you’ll always be stuck in 2nd gear while artists with half
your talent become international superstars? What if there was a
way to cut through all the roadblocks & time-wasting of your
artistic career? Would YOU have the courage to use it?
Please Note: Interest in this method is growing so fast that I may have to
take down this link soon. So keep reading right now so you don’t miss this great knowledge!
Now before I show you how to get from your crappy life to untold riches and the
kind of jet-setting life that I have, I want to first assure you that this is not one of
those online things where you have to develop some massive sycophantic following
on social media. With my secret method you’ll get instant results & you won’t even
need an internet connection! So start thinking about what you REALLY want out of
life, because you’re about to get it!
THE BEGINNING: I’d been hearing whispers about this secret method for a while. You
know how artists talk. Yak yak yak. Nothing stays secret in the Art World for long. At
first I thought it was just some kind of urban legend. But year after year as I watched
one awful artist after another getting rich while I labored, penniless in the obscurity
of my artistic purity, I started thinking “why not give it a try, what have I got to lose?”.
I didn’t start using the method right away though. I’m a pretty cautious guy & I like
to check things out thoroughly before I make major commitments. Sure sometimes
I miss out on the odd opportunity that needs a quick answer but I more than make
up for this by being on solid ground for the stuff that I do pursue.
At that point I had two basic questions. Does the method work & do I have the “right
stuff” to pull it off? The first question was easy. The method works great. It’s actually
quite an ancient method & there are numerous historical examples ot its effective
use. No problems there. In fact, not only does the method work, it appears to work
nearly EVERY time it’s used!
But there was still the question of me & the right stuff. Did I REALLY want to be rich
& famous? How rich? How badly? Would I do whatever it takes? Could I handle being
in the spotlight all the time? Should I set up places beforehand to get OUT of the
spotlight if I need a break?
After a bit of physical prep work & psychological soul searching I was in good shape.
I felt great about using the method & the logistics were well sorted. So I printed out
some cards with my art on them, made sure my autograph signing pen was in good
working order & I was ready to roll. Two days later I had more money than I’d made
in my whole life & I was the world famous artist that EVERYONE was talking about!
THE FIRST SALE: The first time I used the method I was SO
nervous I found myself actually practicing in front of a mirror in the
washroom of a fancy hotel. After all, I’d never done anything like this
before & I didn’t know what to expect. Then that voice in my head
said “You’re a GREAT Artist & You Can Do This!”
At that exact moment a guy walked in & after exchanging greetings
& some small talk, I used the method. And let me tell you, it felt like I was floating on
a magic cloud when he immediately gave me THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS for one of
my art cards!
Then parked right outside the hotel I saw the most beautiful Bentley. I’ve always had a
thing for Bentleys & this was a stunner. So I approached the owner & told him I was
an artist. Then I used the method & he just gave it to me! Keys, registration, his gas
card, the works! He didn’t even want any art in return. I had to practically force him
to take a couple of signed cards. What a great guy!
So there’s me cruising around town. Rich, successful & entitled. The whole alpha artist
thing fit me like a glove from the start. In a couple of hours I had designer threads, I’d
eaten a 3 star meal & the waiters even gave me all their tips!
Just for fun, on the way home I stopped the Bentley to ask five different people for
directions back to my crib. Then I used the method & you know what? Yup, as soon
as I showed them my art they ALL gave me stuff. Money, jewelry, credit cards, they
couldn’t give me stuff fast enough! I gave each of them a signed card of course.
A block from home, I noticed that the place was swarming with cops. I had a strong
sense that it might be me they were looking for. “They’re probably just jealous of my
success”, I thought as I drove away.
The next 48 hours are a blur for me. I vaguely remembered a few of the buyers when
I was sorting through all the stuff, but they’re mostly just a sea of faces. Note to self:
remember to get contact details the next time!
And now I’m living too fast to actually remember any of it. Though I do like looking
back at press coverage of my amazing exploits, popping up all over the city, using the
method to trade my art cards with the jealous cops always a step behind me,
To this day it still feels a bit like “I Did WHAT?”
On the 3rd day, the whole thing became a media circus. Reporters at my house, my
face all over the internet, cell phones tracked, rewards offered for my capture, drones
flying street by street looking for me, every CCTV in the city zooming in on anyone
who might even look like me. By then I was on a plane to South America watching it
all on the airline’s wifi and wondering what took them so long. I mean I left enough
of a trail, don’t you think?
THE EPIPHANY: So there’s me, two days after practicing the method in the bathroom
mirror & I was now a world famous artist & rich beyond my wildest dreams. Isn’t that
everything I ever wanted? Well maybe not everything, but it’s a good start. Like I said,
most of it was a blur.
That prep work I did before I started turned out better than expected as it gradually
became apparent that the me everyone was looking for wasn’t really me. The real me
was hanging out in a forest art studio, with proper mod cons & enough money to last
the rest of my life & then some. And those art cards I sold? They’re worth a fortune.
Even the guy with the Bentley made a profit!
So what now? Sports cars? A luxury yacht, a private jet or two? Japanese steaks for
breakfast & champagne all day long? Insane quantities of hard drugs? Nah, I’m still
me. Never needed any of that stuff & sure don’t need it now. So what was the point
of making all that money then? It’s a good question. Truth is, I don’t know
The thing about being rich & famous is that it opens possibilities. You have a lot more
choices and an opportunity to make a bit of the world exactly the way you want it.
But that still doesn’t mean you’ll ever figure out what it is that you actually want!
Living large in the South American boondocks was great for a while, but I’m a city
boy at heart & I could never relax properly & enjoy the place. Within three months
I was back in the States planning my next art project.
There was an argument going on in my brain for a while between my inner child &
my alter ego about what the next project should be. But once that was sorted out
& we were all working as a team again things started moving forward.
I’d always wondered why a multi-millionaire would get out
of bed with a bug in his ass, torture himself in the gym
before breakfast & then spend the rest of the day in a
sterile office trying to become a billionaire.
When I set up an anonymous “family office” in one of
those nondescript Manhattan office buildings with lots
of other anonymous family offices I had no idea that I
was about to become an expert in the motivations of
ultra high net worthers.
At first New York was just a matter of hiding in plain sight.
But when the investment bankers & hedge fund guys began
pitching my “family office”, wanting ME to invest in THEM,
a lightbulb went off in my head. I suddenly realized that
I’m already sitting on one of the world’s most valuable art
collections. My inner child & my alter ego both immediately
concurred. And that’s how The Secret Method 2.0 was born.
THE SECRET METHOD 2.0: Welcome to my next art project!
I had to adapt The Method & morph it into something a
bit more subtle for this project. It’s a different world up
here in the stratosphere. For one thing these guys have an
entourage & big ass security to stop ambitious artists from
trying to use the method on them.
2.0 is much like the original, where prospective buyers are made to experience a
sudden, compelling need to make a purchase. But 2.0 adds a multi-layer element
by drawing them into a luxurious family office environment where they’re competing
with other, equally wealthy buyers, each of whom has been instilled with the same
compelling need to buy. But only one of them will be allowed to buy the artwork.
No, I don’t kill the lowest bidder after each round as has been suggested by certain
cynics. This is just one of the crazy rumors that people spread to try & shut me down.
Of course I do agressively encourage the lower bidders to stick around & bid on the
next artwork in the collection. And at times, I concede my staff & colleagues may
have been a bit over-enthusiastic in this area of the project. But (fingers crossed) 2.0
has created such a strong demand for my art that so far every prospective buyer has
chosen to stay until they’ve bought something, no matter how long that takes..\